Josh Young

So life has been crazy lately, for a lot of different reasons. Several weeks ago, I decided that I needed to take a weekend away from everything and get by myself and spend some time alone with God. One of the spiritual disciplines that I have royally sucked at over the last 10-12 years is sabbath. I just have a hard time slowing down and spending time being still and quiet.

So that was my goal with this past weekend. I was talking with my buddy, Mike, a couple of weeks ago trying to find a place that was fairly close that I could stay for a couple of days and reprioritize things in my life and refocus and renew myself. He asked, “Have you considered a monastery?” To which I replied, “Um…no.” I mean, why in the world would I consider hanging out at a monastery? Do I look like a monk to you?

To clarify, Mike pointed me to a blog post written by Brian Jones that I had missed not too long before this discussion (interesting timing). Take a couple of minutes and read his post if you can. It’s well worth it. Basically, for the last 12 years, he’s taken one day each month at a monastery and followed a certain schedule that he’s come up with. 7:00am until 5:00pm. Perfect for rest and refocus.

After I read his post, my first thought was, “This is exactly what I had in mind!” His schedule outlined everything I wanted to do in detail. From that moment, I tried to find a place close by that I could go do this. I planned to spend the night my first time so that I could take an entire day/night to do this.

I did some internet searches, and I found a monastery not 20 miles from me in Northern Kentucky that seemed like it would be a good fit. I sent some e-mails to the director of their “Spiritual Life Center” and figured out the details. For a low price, I was going to go early on Saturday, eat lunch and dinner there, spend the night and have breakfast before I left late in the morning on Sunday. I would get a simple room with a small bed, desk and chair. No distractions. They have the perfect setup for personal retreats like this.

So, armed with a couple of books, my Bible, a pen and paper, and a few basic essentials, I headed to the monastery Saturday morning to spend the weekend with the nuns (and yes, “monastery” is the correct term for where nuns live). Here’s a summary of what I did, using Brian Jones’ schedule as a loose guide.

8:00am
Arrived at monastery. Found my contact for the weekend who showed my to my room and a few basic things, including their labyrinth. Not being Catholic, and not understanding it, I pretty much dismissed the labyrinth discussion.

8:30-9:00am
Brain dump. I wrote down every single thing in my mind. To-do lists, struggles, worries, general thoughts, and anything else that would distract me for the day. I tend to do a fairly good job of capturing tasks, etc. on a regular basis since I’m a task list freak, but this is always a good exercise. I had our Creative Team do this before we started on our 2010 Creative Summit, and it was really beneficial then as well.

9:00-9:45am
Being too cold to take a walk outside, I (trying to keep an open mind) decided to give the labyrinth a whirl. I went in the room, read some of the info laying there about it, and tried to do what Brian suggested when he goes on his walk outside: not to talk to God, but just to listen. I have to admit that at first I felt a little weird walking around a giant room on a piece of sail canvas in my socks by myself at a monastery, but once I got past that, it was one of the most interesting experiences of my life. I can honestly say that God spoke to me more clearly while walking out of that labyrinth than he has in my entire life. He really convicted me about some things and gave me some insight into some things that I’m going through right now that were pretty big revelations to me. I made sure to write it all down, as I was carrying my list from earlier with me to capture all my thoughts.

9:45am-12:30pm
Since one of the main things I have been thinking about and struggling with lately is my personal time with God and how to make that work better in my life specific to me personally, Mike had loaned me the book, Too Busy Not to Pray by Bill Hybels. He told me this book literally changed his life, and he doesn’t just say that, so I thought it would be a good place to start. I had read a couple of chapters prior to this past weekend, so I decided to pick up where I left off. I completely finished the book before lunch, taking copious notes.

Mike was right. Not that anything in this book was completely revolutionary or new, but it has literally changed how I spend time with God every day since I finished it. It has given me a much more practical, concrete way to spend time with God each day, and I’m extremely grateful that God led Hybels to write that book. I felt like he wrote it just for me. I won’t go into the details here (read the book!), but a couple practical things that I pulled from the book and have implemented are journaling and writing out my prayers. They work for me. And the “ACTS” model for prayer (which I had heard before, but not in this amount of detail) really struck a chord with me. I’m organized and ordered, and this seems to work perfectly for me. Also, it has shown me the importance of just sitting and listening so that God actually has a chance to speak to me.

Bottom line: great book. Read it as soon as you can, especially if you’re busy and have a hard time slowing down, like me.

12:30-1:30pm
Ate lunch, and then one of the nuns showed me around the place a bit more. Brian was right when he described their food as “plain but plentiful.” That’s exactly what it was! After I ate, I was shown around the monastery. We saw the chapel, she showed me some of the other personal retreat rooms, a couple of rooms that show all their history through the years, their meeting rooms, and some of the paths outside. And then she laid the big one on me. She said, “Did you ever see the movie, Rain Man?” “Of course. Not in several years, but yes.” “Well, this is where they filmed part of it.” It turns out I was staying at the “Wallbrook Institute” where Dustin Hoffman’s character resided at the beginning of the movie. The scene where they’re walking down the long drive lined by big trees, that was there. Unfortunately, the trees (over 100 years old I’m told) became diseased a couple of years ago and had to all be cut down. They do have a table made completely from those trees in their lobby though. She showed me the front of the building where Charlie drove the car, the meeting room where Charlie was questioned, and all the other interesting places in the movie. Who knew.

1:30-2:30pm
Took a nap. Man, Brian was right about this one. Just what I needed.

2:30-3:30pm
Went through the list of “refocusing questions” that Brian posted. These were extremely helpful to me. Here’s the list.

10 QUESTIONS TO REFOCUS YOUR LIFE by Bob Biehl

1. What is my single greatest strength? (What do I “do” the best?)
2. What three decisions are causing me the greatest stress?
3. What is overwhelming me?
4. What impassable roadblock has me stuck?
5. If I could only do three things before I die, what would I want to do?
6. What should I resign from or drop out of? (Peter Drucker said, “Efficiency is doing things right, effectiveness is doing the right things.”)
7. What can I postpone?
8. What things on my “to do” list can someone else do at least 80% as well?
9. What are the “elephants” in my schedule? (Pareto said, “If you’re Noah, and your ark is about to sink, look for the elephants first.”)
10. What are the three things I could do in the next 90 days to make a 50% difference?

3:30-4:00pm
Went for a walk. That list made my head hurt.

4:00-5:00pm
Put what I read in Hybels’ book into practice. I journaled about “yesterday” (see the book for more info), wrote out my prayer using the “ACTS” model, got on my knees and prayed it out loud, and then sat in silence listening to God. Most beneficial hour of my entire weekend. This was the beginning. I have now done this every morning since starting.

5:00-5:40pm
Caught up on my New Thru 30 reading. Spent my time in the gospel of John.

5:40-6:00pm
Had dinner.

6:00-8:00pm
Finished the entire book of John.

7:30-8:30pm
By this point, the silence was pretty deafening. Not only was I in a very quiet place, but there were only three people staying on the floor I was on in the East Wing, and they were part of a Korean Catholic group that took a vow of silence for the weekend. Needless to say, it was very quiet. I knew I would need some noise at some point in the weekend, so I had loaded up my iPod with a few sermons and brought it along. I spent this time listening to Steven Furtick’s message from a couple of years ago in his “Confessions of a Pastor” series called “I Struggle With the Same Sins Over and Over Again.” Super message. Seemed to be just what God wanted to tell me that night.

I had literally witnessed an entire day of God speaking to me like he had never spoken to me before. It was utterly amazing. There is a lot of wisdom in the practice modeled by Jesus in Mark 1:35 where it says, “And rising very early in the morning, while it was still dark, he departed and went out to a desolate place, and there he prayed.” Jesus knew the value of being in a quiet place with his Father to pray and to listen. He did it often. And for most of us, we don’t. Ever. One of the best things we can do is get back to that.

The rest of the night, I listened to a little music and read some more, and then dozed off for the night. The next morning, I woke up refreshed and renewed. I spent some quiet time that morning journaling, praying and listening like the day before (seriously, read this book…this stuff doesn’t take that much time and it will change your life), and ended up leaving early enough to actually go sit in a seat at ACC to worship (instead of being on stage for a change).

Overall, it was the most beneficial weekend I can ever remember. I’m making plans to set aside a day every month or two do go do this. I can already see how valuable it has been to me, and I know if I keep it up (like Brian has), it will absolutely change my attitude, my marriage, my ministry, and every aspect of my life.

This weekend, like the labyrinth I walked, showed me that sometimes the most helpful tools in our lives can be the ones that we least expect or initially dismiss because they’re “different” than what we’re used to. Sometimes that’s exactly what we need.

Josh Young Devotional Thoughts, Ministry, Personal